The World’s Most Awkward Human Nails Dr. Seuss Week

Lindsey Toth
3 min readJun 1, 2021

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In THIS episode of Most Awkward Human…It’s Dr. Seuss Week!

Schools and libraries do fun activities to celebrate, like encouraging students to wear green on Thursday for Green Eggs and Ham Day. Like many other schools, Kate’s school has kids dress up every day of the week. They even send home cute little flyers like the one below to help us parents remember. I’ll take all the help I can get. I was prepared to nail it. This wouldn’t be like the time I sent Wyatt to school without his show and tell item… and then forgot again on his make-up show and tell day. No sir, with a paper reminder in my hand, I can do anything!

Monday, I noticed that not too many kids were wearing red or blue. Hmmmm, I thought. This wasn’t communicated very well. I wonder if those kids forgot to give their flyers to their parents.

Tuesday through Thursday there was low participation as well.

Friday. I sent my sweet girl to school with a black MUSTACHE painted on HER FACE and not a single other child on the playground had one on.

Kate begged me to wash hers off while I told her “nobody else did the homework, THEY should feel silly”. I, of course, washed it off. She was so embarrassed that she wanted to sit with her teacher instead of play outside.

Her teacher looked at me kind of funny when I said “Kate’s embarrassed bc nobody wore a mustache to school today”.

Upon arriving at my gym to drop Wyatt in childcare, I noticed a variety of mustache options to wear. “Wow, they’re doing the same theme day as school”, I thought. It STILL didn’t click.

Got home, looked at the sheet again. Realize the handout did NOT come from school. It, indeed, came from the gym.

Now, I’m caught in an ethical dilemma of whether or not to tell Kate that she really was the only one dressing up all week. Wacky Wednesday and all… I nearly sent her in a rainbow tutu.

I. Just. Can’t.

Better believe I forgot Wyatt’s show-and-tell item again the next week.

[edited version of an original post from Facebook March 1, 2019]

**All Most Awkward Human stories are real life events from my awkward and very rarely exaggerated perspective. This incident occurred in San Jose, CA. I ended up telling Kate what happened. She thinks it’s pretty funny to this day. Poor Wyatt will grow up with the psychological scars that all of us second children have.**

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Lindsey Toth

The World’s Most Awkward Human series chronicles my daily struggle to interact normally with people and my environment.